character truths, bold = always / often; italic = sometimes
ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ ! ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢ !

1. smoking: the action or habit of inhaling and exhaling the smoke of tobacco or a drug.
2. binge drinking: the consumption of an excessive amount of alcohol in a short period of time.
3. drug abuse: the habitual taking of illegal drugs.
4. nail biting: a common body language sign of anxiety/tension.
5. lip biting: a common body language sign of anxiety/tension.
6. night owl: a person who is habitually active or wakeful at night.
7. early bird: a person who rises, arrives, or acts before the usual or expected time.
8. negative attitudes: a philosophy of approaching life with criticism & pessimism.
9. positive attitudes: a philosophy of approaching life with optimism & confidence.
10. swearing: the use of offensive language.
11. superstitious: an irrational belief that an object, action, or circumstance not logically related to a course of events influences its outcome.
12. inspecting fingernails: a common body language sign of boredom.
13. scratching your neck: a common body language sign of uncertainty.
14. foot and finger tapping: a common body language sign of stress/impatience.
15. nose touch: a subtle body language sign of deceit.
16. flipping hair: a common body language sign of craving attention.
17. twirling hair: a common body language sign of flirtation.
18. cracking knuckles: a common body language sign of readiness.
19. hands behind back: a common body language sign of confidence.
20. finger pointing: a common body language sign of authority.
21. hands on hips: a common body language sign of readiness.
22. hands in pockets: a common body language sign of mistrust/reluctance.
23. frequent touch: a common body language sign of warmth/familiarity.
24. throat - clearing: a common body language sign of rejection/doubt.
25. jaw - clenching: a common body language sign of hostility.
26. eye - rolling: a common body language sign of irritation.
27. head - tilt: a common body language sign of interest.
28. whistling: to emit high - pitched sound by forcing breakthrough a small hole between one’s lips or teeth; usually to a tune.
29. humming: make a low, steady continuous sound like that of a bee; usually to a tune.
30. perfectionism: refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.
31. photographic memory: the ability to remember information or visual images in great detail.
32. paranoia: a mental condition characterised by delusions of persecution, unwarranted jealousy, or exaggerated self - importance, typically worked into an organised system.
33. exaggeration: a statement that represents something as better or worse than it really is.
34. intuitive: using or based on what one feels to be true even without conscious reasoning; instinctive.
35. quick - witted: showing or characterized by an ability to think or respond quickly & effectively.
36. interrupting: breaking the continuity of a conversation with one’s own statements.
37. doodling: to scribble or make rough drawings, absentmindedly.
38. irritable: having or showing a tendency to be easily annoyed.
39. gambling: to play games of chance for money; bet.
40. travel - sick: suffering from nausea caused by the motion of a moving vehicle, boat, or aircraft.
41. sensitive: having or displaying a quick & delicate appreciation of others’ feelings.
42. melancholy: a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.
43. chewing gum: the exercise of chewing flavored gum which is not intended for swallowing.
44. fidgeting: to make small movements, especially of the hands & feet, through nervousness or impatience.
45. skeptical: not easily convinced; having doubts or reservations.
46. neat - freak: compulsively obsessed with cleanliness.
47. gossiping: divulging personal information about others.
48. prim: feeling or showing disapproval of anything regarded as improper; stiffly correct.
49. abbreviating: giving others nicknames/shortening names/giving pet names.
50. having a catchphrase: having a sentence or phrase typically associated with a specific person.
ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ ! ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢ !
TAGGED BY: @calystegiaidol
TAGGING: Everyone seems to’ve done this, so not tagging anyone–
But if you wanna do the thing go ahead
Following my AUs and Prompts List from a few months back, here is a compilation of my favorite sentence starters for all your writing needs.
Because most of them aren’t mine, credits are at the end.
SHORT
“Marry me.”
“Do you want me to leave?”
“You are not going without me.”
“I can’t believe you!”
“I swear it won’t happen again.”
“What did you say?”
“I’m not jealous.”
“You’re jealous, aren’t you?”
“We can’t keep doing this.”
“Are you sure this is legal?”
“Isn’t this amazing?”
“I’m going to take care of you, okay?”
“Stay the night. Please.”
“You can’t die. Please don’t die.”
“Run away with me.”
“You did WHAT?”
“Quit whining.”
“Get outta my sight!”
“Why are you so annoying?”
“Were you ever going to tell me?”
“Never in a million years.”
“Don’t ask me that…”
“I might have had a few shots.”
“What’s with the box?”
“W- What are you doing?”
“Say it!”
“I could kiss you right now!”
“Are you done with that?”
“What’s going on here?”
“Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”
“It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”
“Did you do this on purpose?!”
“Kiss me.”
“Are you still awake..?”
“Excuse you?”
“This is all your fault!”
“I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”
“Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”
“I shouldn’t be in love with you!”
“It’s not fair!”
“I could kill you right now!”
“Knock it off!”
“Screw you!”
“You’re a complete moron!”
“I love this song!”
“I can’t be in love with you!”
“Make me.”
“Don’t tempt me.”
“I hate you.”
“You are infuriating!”
“Just shut up already.”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
“Bite me.”
“Eat me.”
“Kiss my ass.”
“Just admit I’m right.”
“Just admit you’re wrong.”
“You are being ridiculous!”
“That’s irrational.”
“Listen to me!”
“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
“Don’t yell at me.”
“That’s it. End of discussion.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“You shouldn’t have said that.”
“Fuck you!”
“Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”
“How dare you?”
“I dare you!”
“It’s you, it’s always been you.”
“Well this is awkward…”
“Just pretend to be my date”.MISCELLANEOUS
“Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”
“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.”
“I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”
“You know what I like most about people? Pets.”
“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”
“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.”
“I don’t hate you.. I just don’t like that you exist.”
“Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag.”
“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”
“Did you really just insult Captain America in front of me?”
“Can I touch your boob?”
“It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”
“You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”
“Give me cake or give me death.”
“On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”
“You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”
“Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”
“No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”
“When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”
“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”
“I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”
“What have I told you about the toilet seat?”
“I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”
“I vote today to be a pajama day.”
“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”
“I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”
“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.”
“You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”
“Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”
“I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”
“What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”
“I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”
“This would not happen if I had a penis!”
“That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”
“All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”
“Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”
“I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”
“To the night you’ll never remember!”
“Excuse me, did the 12:15 bus come by already?”
“Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”
“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”
“You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”
“It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”
“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his/her cake hole.”
“I’m not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren’t even hot.”
“You better take care of that car or I swear I’ll haunt your ass!”
“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“
“It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”
“I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”
“You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”
“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”
“I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”
“Do you need me to kill someone for you?”
“Look out where you’re going, asshole!”
“Fuck the sandwich guy!”
“I did not mean for stripping to come out of this.”
“The whole street is blocked off. The police won’t tell us anything, but I think there’s been some kind of attack… Maybe a bomb?”
“Oh my god, are you okay? I’m calling the police. I think I saw who did this to you.”
“I’m weird, you’re weird, we could have weird little babies and live weirdly ever after if it wasn’t for the fact I find you repulsive.”
“There is nothing wrong with planning a wedding with a video game character.”
“I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”
“There’s been some real friction in our friend group lately. I suggest an orgy to save our friendships.”
“It’s midnight, what do you want?”
“I think I know how to use a bed.”
“If I wake up in the morning and I’m dead… Wait.”
“You are completely unfit to handle a child.”
“We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”
“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”
“When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”
“It’s not a double date, we’re just third and forth wheeling.”PREGNANCY
“I have something to tell you…”
“I think I’m pregnant.”
“I’m pregnant!”
“When were you going to tell me that you’re pregnant?”
“You’re smart and successful with an adorable belly.”
“$50 bucks says it’s a girl/boy.”
“Pregnancy suits you…”
“Hello little one. We can’t wait to meet you…”
“I’ll just be in the bathroom throwing my fucking guts up because our unborn kid wants to be a dick!”
“There’s someone I’d like you to meet…”
“Shh… He/she’s sleeping..”
“I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes and follow me.”
“No, no, no, no, no, we aren’t ready… We aren’t ready for kids yet!”
“Oh, gosh, I felt it! I felt a kick!”FLUFF
“Your hair is so soft…”
“You’re so cute when you pout like that!”
“Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”
“I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”
“What, does that feel good?”
“HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?”
“Are you wearing my shirt?”
“You are ridiculously comfortable…”
“I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”
“You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”
“You’re beautiful, you know that?”
“We should get a puppy!”STARGAZING
“Aren’t they beautiful?”
“These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”
“Shooting star, make a wish.”
“It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.”
“Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.”
“Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…”
“Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?”
“Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.”
“This is why you made me drive three hours out into the middle of nowhere?”
“Is that a– Wait, no, just an airplane.”
“I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here.FLIRTY/SUGGESTIVE/SEXUAL
“Did you just… finish?”
“They always make shower sex sound so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.”
“I’m not actually feeling anything.”
“Are you getting any closer?”
“Why do they make this look so easy in all those porn movies?! This hurts like fuck!”
“Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.”
“Shit sorry, am I going too fast?”
“Wow, you’re hot.”
“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”
“Hey, I’m open minded.”
“Keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”
“I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”
“I’m gonna be honest with you. I’m really horny, and you’re really hot. Can we fuck? Like, now?”
“I see someone’s happy to see me.”
“I saw that. You just checked me out.”
“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”
“Take off your clothes.”
“Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.”
“Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.”
“Boobs are really just squishy pillows.”
“If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.”
“Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.”
“I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.”TEXTS
[text]: What do you want now?
[text]: Do you want to bet on that?
[text]: Guess who just got back in town.
[text]: So I might be in a hospital right now…
[text]: We can’t keep doing this anymore!
[text]: Come on, come to the party!
[text]: Can you pick me up from the bar? Too drunk to drive.
[text]: You have no clue how I feel so shut up.
[text]: I call bullshit.
[text]: You thought you could get away with that, didn’t you?
[text] I gave up great shower sex to be here so don’t say I never did anything for our friendship.
[text] Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
[text] Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.
[text] Who says no to sex and donuts?!
[text] I know what you did last summer…Sources: x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Following my AUs and Prompts List from a few months back, here is a compilation of my favorite sentence starters for all your writing needs.
Because most of them aren’t mine, credits are at the end.
SHORT
“Marry me.”
“Do you want me to leave?”
“You are not going without me.”
“I can’t believe you!”
“I swear it won’t happen again.”
“What did you say?”
“I’m not jealous.”
“You’re jealous, aren’t you?”
“We can’t keep doing this.”
“Are you sure this is legal?”
“Isn’t this amazing?”
“I’m going to take care of you, okay?”
“Stay the night. Please.”
“You can’t die. Please don’t die.”
“Run away with me.”
“You did WHAT?”
“Quit whining.”
“Get outta my sight!”
“Why are you so annoying?”
“Were you ever going to tell me?”
“Never in a million years.”
“Don’t ask me that…”
“I might have had a few shots.”
“What’s with the box?”
“W- What are you doing?”
“Say it!”
“I could kiss you right now!”
“Are you done with that?”
“What’s going on here?”
“Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”
“It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”
“Did you do this on purpose?!”
“Kiss me.”
“Are you still awake..?”
“Excuse you?”
“This is all your fault!”
“I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”
“Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”
“I shouldn’t be in love with you!”
“It’s not fair!”
“I could kill you right now!”
“Knock it off!”
“Screw you!”
“You’re a complete moron!”
“I love this song!”
“I can’t be in love with you!”
“Make me.”
“Don’t tempt me.”
“I hate you.”
“You are infuriating!”
“Just shut up already.”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
“Bite me.”
“Eat me.”
“Kiss my ass.”
“Just admit I’m right.”
“Just admit you’re wrong.”
“You are being ridiculous!”
“That’s irrational.”
“Listen to me!”
“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
“Don’t yell at me.”
“That’s it. End of discussion.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“You shouldn’t have said that.”
“Fuck you!”
“Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”
“How dare you?”
“I dare you!”
“It’s you, it’s always been you.”
“Well this is awkward…”
“Just pretend to be my date”.
MISCELLANEOUS
“Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”
“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.”
“I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”
“You know what I like most about people? Pets.”
“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”
“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.”
“I don’t hate you.. I just don’t like that you exist.”
“Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag.”
“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”
“Did you really just insult Captain America in front of me?”
“Can I touch your boob?”
“It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”
“You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”
“Give me cake or give me death.”
“On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”
“You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”
“Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”
“No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”
“When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”
“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”
“I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”
“What have I told you about the toilet seat?”
“I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”
“I vote today to be a pajama day.”
“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”
“I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”
“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.”
“You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”
“Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”
“I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”
“What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”
“I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”
“This would not happen if I had a penis!”
“That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”
“All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”
“Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”
“I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”
“To the night you’ll never remember!”
“Excuse me, did the 12:15 bus come by already?”
“Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”
“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”
“You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”
“It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”
“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his/her cake hole.”
“I’m not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren’t even hot.”
“You better take care of that car or I swear I’ll haunt your ass!”
“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“
“It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”
“I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”
“You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”
“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”
“I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”
“Do you need me to kill someone for you?”
“Look out where you’re going, asshole!”
“Fuck the sandwich guy!”
“I did not mean for stripping to come out of this.”
“The whole street is blocked off. The police won’t tell us anything, but I think there’s been some kind of attack… Maybe a bomb?”
“Oh my god, are you okay? I’m calling the police. I think I saw who did this to you.”
“I’m weird, you’re weird, we could have weird little babies and live weirdly ever after if it wasn’t for the fact I find you repulsive.”
“There is nothing wrong with planning a wedding with a video game character.”
“I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”
“There’s been some real friction in our friend group lately. I suggest an orgy to save our friendships.”
“It’s midnight, what do you want?”
“I think I know how to use a bed.”
“If I wake up in the morning and I’m dead… Wait.”
“You are completely unfit to handle a child.”
“We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”
“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”
“When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”
“It’s not a double date, we’re just third and forth wheeling.”
PREGNANCY
“I have something to tell you…”
“I think I’m pregnant.”
“I’m pregnant!”
“When were you going to tell me that you’re pregnant?”
“You’re smart and successful with an adorable belly.”
“$50 bucks says it’s a girl/boy.”
“Pregnancy suits you…”
“Hello little one. We can’t wait to meet you…”
“I’ll just be in the bathroom throwing my fucking guts up because our unborn kid wants to be a dick!”
“There’s someone I’d like you to meet…”
“Shh… He/she’s sleeping..”
“I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes and follow me.”
“No, no, no, no, no, we aren’t ready… We aren’t ready for kids yet!”
“Oh, gosh, I felt it! I felt a kick!”
FLUFF
“Your hair is so soft…”
“You’re so cute when you pout like that!”
“Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”
“I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”
“What, does that feel good?”
“HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?”
“Are you wearing my shirt?”
“You are ridiculously comfortable…”
“I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”
“You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”
“You’re beautiful, you know that?”
“We should get a puppy!”
STARGAZING
“Aren’t they beautiful?”
“These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”
“Shooting star, make a wish.”
“It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.”
“Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.”
“Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…”
“Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?”
“Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.”
“This is why you made me drive three hours out into the middle of nowhere?”
“Is that a– Wait, no, just an airplane.”
“I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here.
FLIRTY/SUGGESTIVE/SEXUAL
“Did you just… finish?”
“They always make shower sex sound so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.”
“I’m not actually feeling anything.”
“Are you getting any closer?”
“Why do they make this look so easy in all those porn movies?! This hurts like fuck!”
“Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.”
“Shit sorry, am I going too fast?”
“Wow, you’re hot.”
“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”
“Hey, I’m open minded.”
“Keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”
“I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”
“I’m gonna be honest with you. I’m really horny, and you’re really hot. Can we fuck? Like, now?”
“I see someone’s happy to see me.”
“I saw that. You just checked me out.”
“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”
“Take off your clothes.”
“Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.”
“Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.”
“Boobs are really just squishy pillows.”
“If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.”
“Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.”
“I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.”
TEXTS
[text]: What do you want now?
[text]: Do you want to bet on that?
[text]: Guess who just got back in town.
[text]: So I might be in a hospital right now…
[text]: We can’t keep doing this anymore!
[text]: Come on, come to the party!
[text]: Can you pick me up from the bar? Too drunk to drive.
[text]: You have no clue how I feel so shut up.
[text]: I call bullshit.
[text]: You thought you could get away with that, didn’t you?
[text] I gave up great shower sex to be here so don’t say I never did anything for our friendship.
[text] Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
[text] Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.
[text] Who says no to sex and donuts?!
[text] I know what you did last summer…
Sources: x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life.
[text] I should have never let you back into my life.
[text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that.
[text] Please don’t walk away.
[text] Please don’t do this.
[text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you?
[text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it.
[text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again.
[text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong.
[text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me.
[text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did
[text] The truth is I’m not over you.
[text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you.
[text] I’m seeing someone else.
[text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker?
[text] You’re so selfish.
[text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them].
[text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACELOVING TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah.
[text] Be careful.
[text] I’m only saying it because I love you.
[text] I’m only saying it because I care about you.
[text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee.
[text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week?
[text] Let me take you out, please?
[text] Let me make you dinner tonight.
[text] I want you to be happy.
[text] You’re always safe with me.
[text] I can’t stop thinking about you.
[text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you.
[text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that.
[text] It was so good seeing you.
[text] You don’t need this shit.
[text] I’ll be there in five minutes.
[text] Let me help, please?
[text] You’re important to me.
[text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that.
[text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day.
[text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love.
[text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now.
[text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut.
[text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!?
[text] Lose my number, asshole.
[text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so.
[text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf.
[text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend.
[text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is.
[text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it?
[text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole.
[text] Go fuck yourself.
[text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you?
[text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first.
[text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now
[text] Bye and have a very fuck you day
SEXY TEXTS, BITCH
[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
[text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair.
[text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor.
[text] Come over. With condoms.
[text] You should come over, clothing optional.
[text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT
[text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life
[text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous?
[text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended.
[text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
[text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis.
[text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology.
[text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
[text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
[text] I just need some of your time and all of your body.
[text] I am available for nakedness
[text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it loveDRUNK TEXTS, BITCH
[drunk text] So wat are you really over me no w
[drunk text] AND I UNFOLLOWED YOU ON INSTAGRAM TOO, BITCH
[drunk text] You are my queen and my savior and I love you forever
[drunk text] You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known
[drunk text] I’m eating macaroni and cheese on a slice of pizza and autocorrect just wrote that text for me pretty much, what’s your night like
[drunk text] Listen up slut, you’re one hot piece of ass and if [he/she/they] doesn’t realize it, it’s their loss
[drunk text] but what’s the point of a Disney sing off party if you’re not here. You have to be be the Pumbaa to my Timon
[drunk text] Can you pls remind me tomorrow of how much of a fool I made myself tonight
[drunk text] FUCK YOU YOU’RE GORGEOUS
[drunk text] I think maybe you and me should like go out and eat pizza or something check yes or no
[drunk text] Please don’t hate me I’m too tired and too dizzy to be hated
[drunk text] I hate (him/her) but less when I’m drinking. Thanks, alcohol.
[drunk text] Omf g you need to get over here now I think I’m dyin
[drunk text] SWEEEEEEEET CAROLINE
[5/27/16, 1:20:30 AM]That blog sent me a thing oh fuck
[5/27/16, 1:20:48 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake) stumbles over every piece of my dirty and destroyed blog
[5/27/16, 1:21:07 AM] chibae: oh my god
[5/27/16, 1:21:10 AM] chibae: lol
[5/27/16, 1:21:23 AM] chibae: good
[5/27/16, 1:21:26 AM] chibae: oDob
[5/27/16, 1:21:32 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake) poses on top of all the rubble
[5/27/16, 1:21:35 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): Welcome
[5/27/16, 1:21:43 AM] chibae: ohmfg
[5/27/16, 1:23:37 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake):

[5/27/16, 1:23:40 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): My blog
[5/27/16, 1:23:45 AM] chibae: omf
[5/27/16, 1:23:49 AM] chibae: shhhhh
[5/27/16, 1:23:53 AM] chibae: ur blog is just fine
[5/27/16, 1:25:10 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake):

[5/27/16, 1:25:15 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): What everyone sees
[5/27/16, 1:25:32 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): Just me chillin’
[5/27/16, 1:25:40 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): Welcome to my crib
[5/27/16, 1:25:56 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake) trips on a brick
[5/27/16, 1:26:05 AM] chibae: holy shit
[5/27/16, 1:26:24 AM] gяαηηу נαмѕ (Jake): That’s what everyone gets
[5/27/16, 1:26:43 AM] chibae: i’m cryin g